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2017年10月24日 06:52:28    日报  参与评论()人

贵阳/解放军第44医院人流要多少钱贵 阳 人 流 的 医 院 哪 家 好Re “Poor Little Rich Women” (Sunday Review, May 17):本文是对《从老公手里领贤妻奖金的曼哈顿小妇人》(5月22日)一文的回应:To the Editor: 致编辑:While Wednesday Martin’s article makes for tantalizing ing, she makes sweeping generalizations about a very small subset of women while implying that her observations apply to all women in a narrow slice of the Upper East Side. It’s more hype than truth. I say this as a longtime denizen of this particular fish pond, myself a highly educated, high-achieving woman married to a successful man and now a SAHM (stay-at-home mom). Glam SAHM? I’ve seen them around, but many of us are not.薇妮斯蒂·马丁(Wednesday Martin)的文章真的很吸引读者,但她的做法完全是以偏概全,用她所看到的一小部分女性的生活来暗示上东区一小片的女性的生活都是这样。这里头假想的成分远大于事实。我是以她所描述的那类人的身份来发表这些言论的,我自己就是一个受过高等教育,成就不错然后嫁给一个成功人士,最终成了居家妈妈(SAHM, stay-at-home mom)的女人。光鲜的居家妈妈们(Glam SAHM)?我周围确实有这种人,但大多数都并非如此。Many of my friends here chose to step out of their high-profile jobs once they started having children because they wanted to be the best moms they could be. Me, too. We married successful men because they are our intellectual peers, not sugar daddies. And we volunteer at our kids’ schools because it gives us a chance to see their smiling faces during the day. Do we run our homes like C.E.O.’s? Yep. But so did my mom in Ohio, with three kids and no help. So did my grandmother in Pennsylvania, with 10 kids and no money.我有很多朋友有了孩子后都选择辞去原来不错的工作,那是因为她们想尽可能地做一个好妈妈。我也是这样。我们嫁给成功的男性,是因为他们和我们在智识上一拍即合,而不是傍大款。我们在孩子的学校做志愿活动是因为能在白天也看到孩子的笑脸。我们像CEO一样经营我们的家庭?没错。但我在俄亥俄州的妈妈也这样,她有三个孩子,而且没人帮她。我在宾夕法尼亚州的外婆也这样,她有十个孩子而且身陷贫困。Women-only nights out? Yes, we have them. We share parenting questions and advice from our uniquely mom perspective. We laugh, too, because between the appendectomies, broken arms, stomach viruses and miscellaneous other brush fires we’re always extinguishing, we need to share laughter with our mom friends. Hardly the gender segregation that Ms. Martin darkly suggests.闺蜜之夜?没错,我们的确会举行这样的活动。我们在一起分享抚养子女时遇到的问题,并用母亲的独特视角提出建议。我们也会大笑,因为在阑尾切除术、骨折的胳膊、胃部病毒和其他各种各样需要我们出场的小麻烦里,我们需要和同为母亲的朋友们分享欢笑。这恐怕不是作者马丁所说的性别隔离。Wife bonuses? In all my years on the Upper East Side, this is news to me. I’m not saying it doesn’t happen, I’m just suggesting that it is likely far more rare than Ms. Martin would have you believe.贤妻奖金?我在上东区这么多年还从没听说过这种奖金。我不是说肯定没有,只是想提醒一下,贤妻奖金可能比马丁告诉你们的要少见得多。So it appears that she has allowed a very small sample group to skew her conclusions. Moreover, she has missed out on the rich friendships of the smart, funny, caring neighborhood moms I have been blessed to know.所以,她的结论似乎是被一小部分样本人群带偏了。更重要的是,她没感受到我所享有的与那些聪明、幽默、友爱的邻里妈妈间深厚的友情。LINDA VESTER GREENBERGNew York琳达·韦斯特·格林伯格(Linda Vester Greenberg)纽约To the Editor: 致编辑:Bravo to these women! They have figured out that being there for their kids and running charities is more valuable to them than being a chief executive, working 12 hours a day and hiring nannies as their replacement. (They are the other moms we love to hate.)我要为这些女性喝!她们已经发现陪着孩子、做慈善要比担任行政主管,每天工作12个小时,然后雇一个保姆替她们照顾孩子要好得多(我们比较讨厌这样的母亲)。The most upsetting truth is that we women continue to be our own worst enemies — constantly judging what other mothers choose in order to affirm our own decisions. I realize now that every mother has difference circumstances, options, demands, resources and limits. And we make our choices the best we can for ourselves and the people we love within those parameters. My grandmother used to say, “Your way is not their way.” Women should stand proud of their own choices to construct the lives they want for themselves and their families without judgment or apology. That is the new feminism!最可悲的事情在于我们女性最恶毒的敌人依然是女性自己——不断地通过对其他妈妈们的选择品头论足来说明自己的选择是多么正确。我现在意识到了每个妈妈都面临着不同的境遇和选择,有着不同的需求、资源和限制。在这些因素的控制下,我们都尽可能地为自己和所爱做出最佳的选择。我的祖母过去常说,“你的方式不是他们的方式。”女性为了构建理想中的自己和家庭做出了选择,她们不该为这些选择受到评判或感到歉意,而应为这些选择感到骄傲。这是新一代的女性主义!MICHELE HELOUHamden, Conn.米歇尔·埃洛(Michele Helou)康涅狄格州哈姆登To the Editor: 致编辑:As a fellow social scientist, I applaud Wednesday Martin for her insightful analysis of gender inequality among the elite tribe of Manhattan’s Upper East Side. The rich and privileged usually escape the ethnographic eye, leaving them as the unstudied, unquestioned category while the poor and disempowered are subject to the scrutiny of the sociological lens.作为一个社会科学家,我很赞赏薇妮斯蒂·马丁关于上东区精英阶层性别不平等现象的精辟分析。富人和特权阶层通常会逃过实地研究,使他们成为自然的、无可争议的那一群人,而穷人和被剥削者却要遭受社会学透镜的审查。I have long argued that in the interest of fairness, the American Museum of Natural History should add a diorama next to those for its other North American peoples — one depicting various modern tribes of the ed States: “Wall Street man,” “West Coast bobo,” and perhaps now Ms. Martin’s tribe of glamorous, highly educated, nonworking Manhattan moms.我一直认为,为了公平起见,美国自然历史物馆(the American Museum of Natural History)应该在其他北美民族陈列室旁加一个陈列室——用来展示各种美国现代群体:“华尔街男性”、“西海岸中产群体”,或许现在应该加上马丁所说的“迷人的、受过高等教育的、没有工作的曼哈顿妈妈”群体。DALTON CONLEYNew York道尔顿·康利(Dalton Conley)纽约The writer is a professor of social sciences at New York University.作者是纽约大学(New York University)社会科学教授。To the Editor: 致编辑:There is nothing “poor” about these women. Running a home — or two or three — is similar to running a corporation. You must be organized and proactive and follow up on everything. These women have degrees and know they have a choice. They can be their own executive in their home or outside the home. They choose to run their own empire in their home, which revolves around their children. They groom them and do their best to turn out an excellent “product.” They hire people, they fill out paperwork, they are alert about when to file for schools and camps, and they meet with many people to make it all happen.这些女人并没有什么“可怜”的。经营一个家——或者两三个——跟运营一家公司很相似。你必须组织有序、积极地跟进一切。这些女人拥有学历,也有选择的权利。她们既能对内照料家庭也能在外呼风唤雨。她们自己选择了在家中经营自己以子女为中心的帝国。她们培养孩子,并尽全力使其成为一个优秀的“产品”。她们雇佣别人,填写文书,在申请学校和夏令营时变得机警,她们要接触很多人才能实现这一切。I would say give it up for these women! They are honest about and know what they are doing.我想说别再揪着这些女人不放了!她们知道自己在做什么而且并不会对此加以掩饰。ZELDIE C. STUARTDelray Beach, Fla.泽尔蒂·C·斯图尔特(Zeldie C. Stuart)佛罗里达州德尔雷海滩To the Editor: 致编辑:I have no doubt that there are some women exactly as depicted in this article. However, relegating all of them to a “tribe” is an unsubstantiated generalization hardly befitting an anthropologist engaged in a scientific study. Even more unwarranted is Wednesday Martin’s ultimate determination that all educated, wealthy SAHM mothers are “disempowered,” as is her suggestion that women are squandering their talents staying home with their children.我丝毫不怀疑文中描述的这种女人的存在。然而,把他们全部贬为一个“群体”显然是毫无根据的归类,和作者在做科学研究的人类学家的身份极不搭调。更荒谬的是作者薇妮斯蒂·马丁的终极结论:所有受过教育且富有的居家妈妈们都是“没什么权力的”。她认为女人们在家里陪孩子就是对自己才华的暴殄天物。Clout and cash are seemingly synonymous for Ms. Martin. Perhaps that should be the focus of her next anthropological “work”: why people equate power with money. Clearly the women who make the choice to stay at home with their children do not agree. For many of them, it is a privilege to be with their children, and there are plenty of women who would give up all the earning potential in the world to have that opportunity.马丁似乎将影响力和金钱混为一谈了。也许这应该作为她的下一项人类学“研究”:为什么人们会认为权力就是金钱。显然这些选择在家里陪孩子的女人并不这么想。对她们中的很多人来说,权力是能陪伴在孩子身边的机会,而且世界上有很多女人愿意为了这种机会放弃一切可能的收入。TARA KANTORScarsdale, N.Y.塔拉·坎特(Tara Kantor)纽约州斯卡斯代尔To the Editor: 致编辑:Thank goodness we don’t all have anthropologists following us around to document our foibles. I imagine that most of us wouldn’t come off looking much better than these Upper East Side matrons.谢天谢地,我们不都由人类学家来跟着记录我们的弱点。我想我们大部分人都不比这些上东区的主妇好到哪里去。DANIEL REIFMANYad Binyamin, Israel丹尼尔·莱弗曼(Daniel Reifman)以色列雅德本雅明 /201506/379331贵州省贵阳/市痛经哪家医院最好的 3.Religious Preferences3.宗教信仰In addition to her upbringing and background, you also should find out if she has any religious preferences and if so, what those preferences are. Like money, religion can undermine your romance before it even begins. Couples who fail to see eye-to-eye on religion could be headed for disaster if they cannot work out these differences before getting married or building a permanent commitment to each other. Like asking for her age, you may be uncomfortable asking about her religious ideals. Even so, you could be saving yourself future troubles by getting this information sooner rather than later.除了个人经历和家庭教育方式,你还应该看看她是否有任何宗教信仰,若有的话是哪种宗教。和钱一样,宗教能在这段浪漫刚开始时就毁掉它。如果情侣们不能在宗教问题上达成一致,不能在结婚或是做出终生承诺前处理这些差异,他们的关系将走向灾难。和询问她的年龄一样,你可能在问她的宗教理想时也不太自然。虽然如此,这也可能比你以后才了解更能避免许多未来的麻烦。Many couples fail to appreciate how religion can impact their relationship until it comes time to plan a wedding, raise children, or plan out other important details. Once they find out that they have different ideals, it can be a major battle to compromise, particularly if you both have deep beliefs that you are unwilling to relinquish.许多情侣都没有重视宗教信仰对他们的关系的影响,直到他们要筹备婚礼、养育孩子或是策划其他重大细节时才意识到这一点。一旦他们发现双方有不同的想法,就会有一场“看谁先妥协”的大战,尤其是两人都坚定自己绝不放弃的时候。Even if you were not brought up in a particular faith or in a religious family, you should always find out if the girl you want to ask out has a religious affiliation and how devoted she is to it. It is important that this part of her be something to which you can conform yourself to or at least accommodate for your own peace of mind.即使你不是在有着特定信仰或是宗教家庭中长大的人,你也应该注意你要约会的女孩有无宗教信仰并且信仰有多深。她在这一部分的想法能与你相符或至少能让你内心平静是很重要的。2.Health2.健康Many people who have serious health challenges look perfectly well and display few outward symptoms. In reality, however, they could be gravely ill and need constant medical attention. Some of the silent conditions whose symptoms may not be obvious at first glance include anemia, hepatitis, chronic lung disease, diabetes, and even heart problems. When you want to ask out a girl that you like, you may do well to find out if she has any health challenges that could call for you to act promptly. Being y to take care of her in case of an emergency requires that you know these details before you begin dating.很多有健康隐患的人看起来非常健康,症状并不外显。然而,实际上他们可能重病在身并且需要长时间医疗看护。一些病症很不明显,其症状很难一眼辨识,例如贫血,肝炎,慢性肺病,糖尿病甚至心脏病。当想约一位你心仪的女孩外出时,你需要做足功课,了解她是否有健康问题需要你能随时做应急处理。在你们开始约会之前,为了以防万一,你要了解她的病症情况并且随时做好照顾她的准备。These conditions and others like them also will have a significant role in your future relationship with her if you both become serious about each other. You will be called upon to learn how to monitor her appearance for signs of illness and act quickly to help her if she becomes ill. If this is something you can handle, you can ask her out and face the likelihood that you will at some point deal with her health issue. If you cannot, it would be best that you avoid asking her out entirely.如果你们正式确立关系了,以上列举的及其他类似的病症对你们以后的相处来说都非常重要。你需要了解如何从她的面色看出发病征兆,一旦判断发病,能够快速应对。如果你能处理上述情形,那么你可以约她出去,也可以处理日后当她身体出现状况时要照顾她的情况。如果你难胜此任,那么干脆不要约她了。This information also comes into play if you want to have children some day. If she has a hereditary illness that could be passed onto your children, you at least will be prepared to seek out genetic counseling or other medical advice if your relationship progresses to that point. Health challenges at any age can determine the outcome of your dating chances with the girl you like. You can prepare now by finding out what, if any, conditions she may be dealing with right now.如果你日后想要孩子,这些信息也能派上用场。如果她的病具有遗传性,可能传给你们的孩子,那么在你们的关系走到这一步时,你至少应该做些遗传或者医疗咨询寻求帮助。无论在任何年龄,健康问题都会影响你和心仪女孩的约会。你可以从现在开始,了解她的健康状况。1.Children1.孩子Couples should share the same mindset when it comes to having children. Many people begin relationships and reach the point of wanting to get married, only to find out that one party abhors the idea of becoming a parent. Even if at first it seems like you both are just living in the moment and seeing where fate takes you, you should investigate how open she is to being a mother at some point in the future. You can decide whether or not to ask her out based on her answer and how well her answer matches your own intentions.对于生小孩与否,夫妻需要想法一致。很多人谈恋爱以后,甚至到了结婚的时候才发现另一半根本不想要小孩。就算一开始你们只活在当下,不考虑以后,你也需要弄清楚她将来对“母亲”这个角色是否接受。你可以根据她的回答以及你们的契合程度决定是否要约她出去。It is also important to remember that few people change their minds about this important topic. If you want to have kids, but she does not, you should not continue to date her with the belief that she will be more receptive to kids in the future. This hope more than likely will lead to your being heartbroken. Rather than set yourself up for disappointment, you should find out this important detail and avoid asking her out if she says she does not want children.切记:生育观念很重要,一旦形成,很少人会改观。如果你想要孩子而她只想过二人世界,你抱着她未来会改观的想法和她继续交往也是徒劳。怀抱着此种愿景,未来你只会更加心碎。与其等待着失望,倒不如一开始就弄清楚她的想法,如若与你背道而驰,还是不要约她出去了。Similarly, if you do not want kids, but she does, you should avoid stringing her along in the relationship. After you find out that she wants kids, you should tell her your side of the argument and politely decline asking her out if she cannot abide by your mindset. You both may be disappointed, but you also save yourself more intense grief later after your hopes for parenthood are dashed. You also spare any kids you might have from being raised by one parent who in reality would have preferred to remain childless for the rest of his or her life.同样的,如果她想要孩子而你不想,你也不能为了和她交往而有所欺瞒。在你发现你们想法不一致时,你应该告诉她你的观点,如果她无法认同,你应该打消约她出去的念头。也许你们都会很失落,但是这比日后承受做父母的梦破碎时的痛苦要好的多。同时,你也挽救了一个孩子,如果他的父亲或母亲并不想生他,他的成长会很痛苦。A myriad of information can determine how well you and the girl you like can build a relationship with each other. Before you ask her out, you must determine these details. The answers to these questions can impact you legally, financially, and emotionally. You can spare yourself a future of turmoil or alternatively look forward to a life of happiness by having these facts on hand before you ask out the girl in which you are interested.种种你要了解的信息可以决定你和心仪女孩能否建立关系。在你约她出去之前,你必须作出决定。对以上问题的回答可以法律角度,经济角度,情感角度影响你。可以让自己避免未来陷入麻烦,又或者可以做好准备,确认好她的想法,约她出去,开始幸福的生活。审校:小飞侠 编辑:Freya然 校对:丸子 /201507/386240贵 阳 做 人 流 医 院 那 个 好

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贵阳/妇科医院哪家好呀 Thank you for calling Customer Service.This call may be recorded,so please feel free to sing along with our on-hold music.;感谢中心。本次通话可能会被录音,因此您可以随着我们的等待音乐随意歌唱。 /201507/388138贵 阳 怀 孕 做 无 痛 人 流 多 少 钱贵阳/巧克力囊肿治疗费用

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